GUEST CRITIC: Think Like a Man Too

NEW GUEST CRITIC SERIES #1

As busy I get from time to time, I find that I can't see every movie under the sun, leaving my friends and colleagues to fill in the blanks for me. As poetically as I think I wax about movies on this website as a wannabe critic, sometimes a simple sentence or two from a friend says it all. Sometimes, it inspires me to see the movie too and get back to being my circle's go-to movie guy. Sometimes, they save me $9 and you 800+ words of blathering. In a possible new review series, I'm opening my site to friend submissions for quick-hit movie reviews.

TODAY'S CRITIC

Hodges Smith, Jr. is the greatest decent shooting guard that ever lived in both the Gallagher and Bennett residence halls of Saint Joseph's College, the pillar of Midwest liberal arts education nestled in the rustic hamlet of Rensselaer, Indiana.

The incredibly repetitive musical beats and stylings of Jay-Z and Beanie Siegel that he insisted, as a tireless warrior-in-training, be piped through the main court sound system during private and rigorous shootarounds and practices can still be heard echoing through the rafters of the Sharf Alumni Fieldhouse, even now, nearly 15 years later. The nets and floorboards still feel the sting of his roundball artistry.

Don't let the years fool you. The man can still ball. When he's not making fools of people at local gyms, the man, the myth and the legend of Hodges Smith, Jr. protects and serves his home and community as a member of the Chicago Police Department, meaning his jump shot isn't his sole deadly weapon.

The man is a single father to three lovely daughters and enjoys the occasional fine cigar, the first sip of brown liquor after work, rants on NBA basketball, and any and all internet memes that encourage people to laugh about life.

HIS REVIEW

"THINK LIKE A MAN TOO"-- 2 STARS

"Think Like a Man Too" was GARBAGE! I just didn't like it. The best part of the movie was the Bel Biv Devoe part. It definitely wasn't funnier than the first movie. It was just whack! The whole storyline was just thrown together on some, "let's hurry up and piggyback off the success of the first movie" type stuff. I wanted a refund for sitting through that dumb ass movie.

CONCLUSION

See! What did I tell you? That saves you $9 and me that money and 800 words. I'd like to thank Hodges for taking the leap as this website's first official guest critic. Thanks for letting me play along! Let's keep this going. Friends, if you see a movie that I don't see and want to be featured on my website (and get a fun fake biography written about you), hit up my website's Facebook page and you can be my next GUEST CRITIC!